One of the guys, and other ways to not attract men

I hate hearing it. In all honesty I hate when women complain at all about not being able to attract men. Attraction is natural, you can't force it. If someone isn't attracted to you, well they aren't attracted to you. Accept it and move on.

The worst form of this complaint is when a woman complains that she can't attract men because or even though she is one of the guys. I have a friend who was making this complaint to me. She said being one of the guys wasn't working for her. I looked at her dumbfounded. What does she understand the phrase to mean?

Before I go any further let me say I find nothing at all wrong with being one of the guys. Infact, I usually consider myself so. I get along well with men because for the msot part I don't fall into the category of stupid girl (although I do have my moments).

Being one of the guys means exactly that, they see you as another friend, a girl that doesn't have all the girl problems. It means that they can hang out with you, do fun things with you, and be themselves around you. It means that they appreciate your ability to just be their friend.

It is not a stepping stone into a relationship. If you think it is then you should look at your approach.

And what is this obsession with attracting people that aren't attracted to you? Attraction is immediate. It doesn't really grow. You don't look at someone who doesn't attract you and think, "hmmm... maybe in time". Or maybe you do. I'd say if you do that your are heading down the path of most resistence.

Attraction that grows or is forced is likely fleeting. We are attracted to people for all sorts of reasons. Physically, emotionally, spiritually, comedically (is that even a word?).

I am not saying that there aren't circumstances where being one of the guys leads to dating a guy, I've had it happen in the past. It also didn't work. Because you are consider one of the guys. You aren't allowed to be one of the girls. A man that build attraction for you based on you being one of the guys will lose that attraction when he can't see you as such anymore.

Of course this is all in my very humble opinion.